4/30/2024 0 Comments Lesbian chat icqMostly, it was all about making friends, connecting with others, and learning how to be comfortable in our own skins. Several of the chatters I me there I became friends with in real life after an eyeball or two, and some I worked with on advocacy projects here and there. It was just a place to be yourself, to talk about daily life, to find other lesbians to talk to-with no judgments. While some were in the room in search of love, others were there simply for friendship. From that chatroom, I met other lesbians who showed me that we come in different colors, shapes, and sizes. We were all looking for other women like ourselves, and without a proper physical space to actually meet other women, the next best recourse was a chatroom-a private virtual space that only a few knew about, and for those who did, shared an unspoken understanding that it was not to be spoken about too loudly, lest someone gets outed.Įventually, one of the chatters named Rhyder decided that there were too many Filipinas in the Asian Room that it was due time to create our own room, and thus, the Filipino Lesbians Online (FLO) was created. If my recollection is correct, I was the youngest Filipina when I joined the room, while most were in their early to mid-20s who were already working-save for one who was still in college (who later became a girlfriend). Despite being a chatroom for Asian women, most of the chatters were Filipino some based overseas, while a number of us were just in Manila. I wasn’t risking being found out.Ĭontrary to what might be thought of as a scary world, the Asian Room chatroom was actually a warm and welcoming place for any woman who was exploring her identity. It was 1998, and I was neither out nor certain if I really wanted people to know I was a lesbian. The website screamed “gay” that I had to make sure I had Microsoft Word open, in case someone entered my room and saw the page. Once connected, you can only hope that no one calls, otherwise you’d get disconnected and would need to dial up again.Īfter some futile attempts at chatting via IRC (internet relay chat) and ICQ (the late 90s version of a messaging software), a quick Yahoo search led me to gay.com. It would take a while to connect, and while waiting, your computer would be making this weird robotic sound that was music to the ears. You needed a phone line with a modem, a dial-up connection (usually pre-paid hello, Edsamail, ISP Bonanza, and Pacific Internet!), and a pretty decent computer that could connect you to “fast” internet with 56kbps connection. With no more books to read, I needed to get on the internet. I scoured the newspapers and magazine articles, and by then, I had borrowed every book in the Rizal Library that I had to write the call numbers for books listed under the Library of Congress’ HQ classification at the margins of my library card (yes, it was the year before the lib automated its system). magazine column that I would cut out and keep. Suffice it to say, I had a feeling it wasn’t nearly “just a phase.” Prior to going online, my other source of information about gay and lesbian issues was from a Mr. I was looking for others like me: a girl who likes other girls, too. There were hardly any other lesbians in the Ateneo-much less a suspected one, like that batchmate whom one of my friends described as, “cute, like a little boy.” It lasted four years, and by the time I was in college, we had both outgrown each other. I just turned 18-a sophomore in college-and the brand new computer was a gift in lieu of a grand debut. Back in high school, I had a relationship with another girl-a surprising twist of events for a goody-two-shoes nerd in a coed school. I was in the Asian Room of the Women’s Floor in what was a website called gay.com. But that night, I decided to be completely honest: “18, F, Pasig.” The chatroom was full it was a Friday night, after all, and most people were ready to stay up late just chatting with strangers.įor those who remember what the early days of the internet was like, being asked this question either prompted you to be honest or answer with your chosen persona for the day. It was almost midnight and the house was still.
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